Asda

[Bjorn]

You've probably heard this before - hey ho!

Shopping at Asda

One day in line at the work's cafeteria, Jack says to Mike behind him.
"My elbow hurts like hell, I suppose I had better see a doctor".
"listen don't waste your time" Mike replies, "There is a diagnostic
computer at Asda. Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell
you whats wrong with you and what to do about it. It takes ten seconds and only costs five pounds.... a lot quicker than seeing a doctor"
So Jack collects a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Asda. he
deposits five pounds and the computer lights up and asks for the urine
sample. Ten seconds later the computer ejects a print out:
"You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy
activity. It will improve in two weeks"
That evening while thinking about how amazing this new technology was, Jack began wondering if the computer could be fooled.
He mixed some tap water, a stool sample form the dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter and masturbated into the mixture for good measure.Jack hurried to Asda, eager to check what would happen. He puts in the money and pours in his concoction and awaits the results.
Ten seconds later the computer prints the following..
1. Your tap water is too hard, get a water softener.
2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti fungal shampoo
3 Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab
4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
5. And if you do not stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get
better........


.... thank you for shopping at Adsa.

[Tuppy]

[user703]

[user886]

Classic!

[RSE MOTORSPORT]

Excellent

[maw!]

[user630]